Is it me?

I haven't felt like posting.

I am a happy person. I have a lot to be happy about. Life is good. Well, except the Boy is still having almost nightly seizures, but at least we have another appointment to see yet another Doctor and I will run this one into the ground before I let him out of all the tests I want. BUT...

I haven't felt like talking. Odd for me.

I look back on the past few months and they have been very painful. I have been betrayed a few times by people I thought I should be able to trust and it has taken its toll. Didn't realize it until today. I can't look as many strangers in the eye, I don't feel like making friends. Most seem to take what they want and leave. Or I become the butt of the joke. It hurts and I am very tired of being talked about. My life is helping people. I make them smile, I give them hope, I validate them and I ask for nothing but friendship in return and I get my whole life made into a sport. I opened my heart, I gave my time and then they talk about how selfish and inconsiderate I am because I don't call (Not you Nando...never you!). I validate their emotions and they make fun of mine. And Glenn, he has been born the brunt of some of it. Poor, sweet man. Just straight and stupid jealousy caused his pain. And I just don't have the energy to be charming at the moment, outside of my own family and a few very select friends. Again, I am rambling but I need to speak it. And so I have. No pity. I am done.